I'm fine
by masterpieceMCFLY
Summary: Danny Jones' best friends is dealing with so much, she can't on hew own, so Danny helps her.  This didn't turn out as I expected, and is not that good... but oh well...


I opened my eyes after, maybe sleeping for ten hours. Still I felt so tired. I closed my eyes trying to sleep more, but couldn't.

I grabbed my phone to see the time. 1:17 pm, and noticed I had three messages. I read them and deleted them without bothering to reply.

**I started college not long ago, but you see, I couldn't bring myself to do anything, I went to see the counsellor and she diagnosed me with depression, not that I was surprised by that.**

**I went to see her and a psychiatrist for a month, I also had to take some pills. But nothing changed. So I stopped going to my appointments and dropped out of college. And after awhile stopped taking the pills. **

**Why did I do that? I hate psychologist I think they just want my money. I have gone to see four of them through my life. The first was when I was around four, my father died, and I stopped talking to people and eating certain food, I just remembered I used to escaped from the psychologits and didn't talk to them at all. The second time was when my mum and the school found out I used to cut myself, an habit I haven't stopped completely. Then my mum sent to see another one, not sure why though, when I was sixteen years old. And then the ones I told you about, the ones from college, at eighteen years old. **

**Oh, I forgot to mention, when I was thirteen I had anorexic and bulimic tendencies for a short time, around three months but stopped when my mother found me throwing up (purging). And at the age of fifteen almost sixteen, I started again, and I started to cut again, more frequently, and so far is a secret.**

**And by the age of thirteen I started to pull out my own hair, my mum used to hit me when she caught me, and stopped doing it for awhile…**

**So to make it short, I pull out my own hair (Trichotillomania), I cut myself, (self-injury), I have an eating disorder, and depression. I'm really fucked up, right? **

**When I was at college, I had a hard time concentrating and remembering thing, and I just wanted to go home. I would also cry everyday, I still do that though. **

**My friends for school never call me or anything, and fought with my best friends. My new friends at college, well I pushed them away, as I pushed everyone else. **

**I take sleeping pills now, because there were times that I couldn't sleep all night, it was 7:00 am and I still couldn't sleep. **

**Danny, one of my old friends, is always there for me, and I have confessed some things to him, but not all, not even half of it, I've tried to push him away too, but somehow he's always around. **

**I remember when I went to school, I was and still am a shy girl, but always had a smile on my face, even when I was feeling like dying inside. And I fooled everyone, nobody would even imagine what I was hiding. But Danny always knew when something was bothering me. **

"_Are you alright?" Danny used to asked me every time he thought something was wrong with me._

"_Yes, I'm fine" I replied with a smile on my face every time he asked. _

**He never bought that overused lie, but dropped it, knowing I would get upset if he kept asking me. **

**He saw cuts on my arm and made me stop, he would tell I looked beautiful when I felt the ugliest. He would always made me laugh when I was dying inside. **

**But since we went to different colleges we didn't see each other that much. And even when I sometimes don't reply his messages or don't answer his calls I miss him, and would love to see him. He visits me sometimes, and knows something is really wrong but I can't tell him what. **

The bell rang making me open my eyes again.

"Mum? Aren't you going to open?" I asked when it rang again.

I stormed out of bed, cursing under my breath. Believe me or not, something as easy as getting up from bed made me tired, dizzy and my breathing heavy, my heart was beating like if I had run for a long time.

I opened the door to reveal Danny, he smiled at me when he saw me.

I cursed in my head, because I didn't want him to see me in this state, I hadn't shower in two days, and my hair was a mess, and probably my face was puffy for all the time I had slept.

"What are you doing here?" I asked him.

"I'm being your friend." he said walking inside.

We went to my bedroom, which was really a mess. But he didn't seem to mind.

"Tell me please what's wrong Lilly!" he said sitting on a chair while I was on the bed.

"Nothing's wrong. I'm fine Danny!"

"You're my best friend but you have a defect I hate, you don't get things out of your chest, and that hurts you, please let me in, I want to help you."

He was right, I never tell anybody anything. Sometimes I would be dying to tell someone some thing it was bothering me but I couldn't say it.

"I can't." I whispered with tears forming in my eyes. "I don't want to lose you."

"Why do you think you would lose me?" Danny asked, holding my hands.

"You'd think I'm mad."

He smiled at me and got closer to me. "Listen well, I would never think that, do you understand?" I nodded. "All these years I have been by your side and believe me or not I have noticed things and I didn't say it before because I was afraid you would pushed me away, but now I'm afraid of losing you, in a different way."

"What have you noticed?" I asked him after an awkward silence.

"Well, the cuts on your wrist, but you know that, but I saw them after you promised me you wouldn't do it again. I also noticed how you practically shrank in such a short time, and you skip meals, and I'll never forget that time you fainted in front of me, and how light you were, and when I hold you tighter I could feel your bones and found the diet pills the other day, next to a certain notebook."

I started to cry. He knew almost everything. In that notebook I write what I ate, the calories I burnt, and the days I wouldn't eat anything.

After that, I told him everything, there was no point in lying anymore, and, surprisingly he didn't leave like I thought he would do. He stayed by my side.

**After that long day, Danny insisted me to move in with him, and I did.**

**He would wake me up really early, had a walk with me, and then served me my breakfast.**

**It wasn't simple what he was doing, and yet, he succeeded. He fixed me.**

**I enrolled in college again, and I do things I used to enjoy, and got to enjoy them again. And have made lots of friends, I also talk to my old friends.**

**I eat normally now, without having Danny to see if I really did eat. Sometimes I feel bad about what I ate but Danny makes it go away quickly.**

**I don't remember the last time I cut myself, sometimes I feel like doing it but then I calm down and do something to make my mind focus on something else.**

**And sometimes I pull out my hair but when I notice what I'm doing, I stop right away .**

**Danny was like my own angel of God, he was there when I needed him the most, he was there to listen and not criticize me, he was there to catch me if I fell, and I did fall hard, but he helped me up and is there if I trip.**

**Danny means the world and much more to me, he's my best friend, always has been, he's my savoir too, he saved me from myself.**

**And only time can tell what will happen to us, maybe date? Marriage? Or just being the best friends we have ever been.**


End file.
